You Do You

Jealousy is that green eyed monster that creeps into your mind when you dread it the most, it’s one of those feelings that eats away at you, and not just a nibble but chunks at a time, opening the gateway of toxic energy and leaving a foul taste in your mouth. 

Feeling green is an uncomfortable emotion that effects the majority of us, in fact to put bluntly and brutally – it’s agony. It frequently makes you feel insecure and ultimately boils down to you not feeling adequate. I have to tell you what is probably one of the best kept secrets that we all know, but never pay attention to – you are enough. 

I used to gaze at myself in the mirror, and think myself into this particularly putrid shade of green, the type of green where the brown in my eyes faded into oblivion and I would have sworn on anything that there was a sudden adaptation of green tint. I personally believe this to be without a doubt one of the hardest traits to train yourself out of, because jealousy as much as I hate to say it, is all in your head. You are becoming your own worst enemy, and as this negative, devilish alter ego attempts to take over, it feeds off your fears like a parasite, and you involuntarily hand it control by repeatedly putting yourself down. 

Illustration via Recipes For Self Love

Sometimes when you see others doing something spectacularly, instead of celebrating their success, you immediately reflect their achievement into your life and seek instant self-gratification that you are also succeeding – if not found within a split second your mind diverts to thinking you are failing, and thus your spiraling begins. This way of thinking is no way of life, it’s time for change. I’m not going to tell you that it’s an easy trait to drop, because it’s not. Fighting the urges to allow these feelings that are so used to creeping in do not go away overnight, but I promise you that getting rid of them is the best thing for you. So time to switch things up, you are better than this emotion, this dark feeling ebbing your self love away. 

Focus on understanding, and conquering the transformation of your jealousy from negative energy into positive. Instead of allowing jealousy to have a negative hold on you, lock it down, decline those thoughts feeding off your deepest insecurities. 

Jealousy is in short, desire. There is nothing wrong with desiring something, this shows identification in knowing what it is that you want. See this as a motivator, as something that you are striving for. When you have a feeling that you recognise fits those dreaded ‘symptoms’ of jealousy, you are without realising it pigeon holing your desire into a box that is labelled ‘goals that will never be achieved’. Don’t suppress your feelings, address them, and transform them into encouragement. You are your biggest fan. Who knows, with a little more self love, and confidence this new way of thinking could help you to discover new facets that you never knew existed. 

Gen Z, and millenials are so focused on receiving instant gratification, that we forget the more we compare ourselves to reputations, money, appearances, and the materialistic things of our world that fulfills us, the more we are controlled. Remember, you in your entirety are enough. You have always been enough, and you always be.

Two words for you… Hustle and conquer. 

Words: Persephone Quarme